December 21, 2016
June 17, 2016
My life is at its most complete state, but happiness shouldn’t be taken for granted. I hope to write about it..
From the minute I know I was pregnant, besides all The Joy, it was actually roller coaster for me, overwhelming.. Why am I getting all the pregnancy symptoms anyone could have? Morning sickness didn’t let me off until 4 months later. I was so laid back after that and started to enjoy my pregnancy since it subsided a bit.. we even started planning for our babymoon to Bangkok!! Who will forsee that one day before our trip.. just what are the chances.. we were told there were “abnormalities” found during the 5-months detailed scan, and this Doctor, looking very concerned.. wrote an additional remark asking us to do further tests to be assured that it isn’t Downs. Whut?! Whattttt???? Downs? You kidding me rte? One day before our babymoon, and this happens. We thought of cancelling the trip, even until the last minute sitting at Coffee Bean at the Changi Airport, I wanted to go home so much, but I was glad Pail got me up the plane. It was a Public Holiday and weekend next 2 days, clinics won’t be open, so there was no point staying in Sg crying, might as well cast everything aside, come back then face it. We came back after a week to do the test, waited another 2 weeks for the results to see a “Low risk” returned. Phew! A loud Phew!!
Life was put on “Fast forward x60”, since I’ve last written about her Birth Story.. hoho.. lets talk about Confinement!! Yes, the last stage of “Pregnancy”, they call it the Fourth Trimester. I survived! Thanks to Pail who stayed by my side, he took a month’s leave to accompany me! To all new-Dads, you may not know but your support is super important!
Thanks to my MIL who came over to stay with us, instead of me going over. I am so very grateful for that. 各位觀眾, I managed to stay alive after not showering for 12 freaking days.. and only drinking red dates logan water, omg can you imagine someone craving to drink plain water?!! Muahahahaha….
For the first month, I
only need to wake up every four hours to pump gas milk, she will help with the night feeds. Hah.. waking up to pump milk shouldn’t be “only”, it’s freaking tiring.. MIL had doubts about breastfeeding, and I still remember got soo stressed up with that, she couldn’t understand how direct-latching works, she would always first think direct latch isn’t filling enough. Baby is not full because breastmilk is too dilute and because you can’t see how many ounces through direct latching. Our Little Sesame only latched for the first week, then I became exclusively pumping. Sigh.. anyways, I am already grateful enough that she is willing to help and learn how to handle breastmilk! ENDURE! And by now, she is totally an expert already! 😀
And happily at three months, I went back to full-time latching because I was on my own! Yay! Some tips here.. there are many reasons why a baby is screaming even after a nap, after feeding or after changing of diaper. It could be as simple as she needs to be burped, or she just needs a change in position! Learn this! It’s not just hungry! You don’t need to keep feeding! My baby knows how to reject milk when she is full, but not all babies know, sometimes you end up overfeeding!
I felt like I’ve entered a whole new world in Breastfeeding! My entire life changed!!!
One day after delivery, how to get my newborn to latch on correctly? How to handle breastmilk? How many hours can I leave the milk in room temp.? How long can I keep the milk in fridge/freezer? And as stupid as it sounds, I need to watch a Youtube video to learn “How to fill a milk bag without air bubbles”. And as funny as it sounds, Pail was the one who taught me how to do it in d end! Haha!
And wth is breastfeeding jaundice? No, sunbaths doesnt help, she just need to drink more to flush out the bilirubin! Doctor say one! Day and night (and middle of the night) pumping and pumping.. Finally milk supply kicks in vigourously and I start suffering from bad engorgement, blocked ducts, big and small lumps over.. and mastitis, high fever, inflammation, milk blisters.. it’s crazy!!!!!! I stood countless times in the hot showers for hours just to hand-express milk to clear the blocked ducts.. On top of all the carrying, I injured my wrist tendon and till now I can’t exert pressure or even write properly without feeling pain.
Day and night, I need to plan my pumping schedule around the clock whenever I go out now.. and at work, I’ll need to book meeting rooms to pump milk, and if there are none available, I need to wait to pump during lunchtime.. My HR has just recently placed a ban on using meeting rooms.. Sigh! Damn pissed.
And.. its gonna be a long time since I can wear pretty dresses because they are not bf-friendly! There are three sections in my wardrobe now, nursing-friendly, pumping-friendly and not-friendly clothes. And noooo wired bras, so I bought like a dozen of Uniqlo Airism Bratops, they are like the Best Nursing bra!! I can nurse at ease under a nursing cover because it’s so convenient.
Do you know every bf-ing mom carry sibeh-heavy bag to and fro work (No more small and fashionable handbags) because the pump and bottles of milk with icepack in a cooler bag are no joke! If we need to give up seats to the needy on trains, I think we should give up seats to bf-ing working mums too!
Also, it is a luxury to be able to sleep through for two-four hours. This is seriously affecting my health! When your baby still can’t sleep through the night yet, she wakes up and smiles at u at 3am, I really don’t know to laugh or cry! By 6 months, I am certain I want to cry! T_T I was reluctant to do Sleep Training but I think I should have done it earlier… sobs
Breastfeeding knowledge is so wide that I’ve already started reading up during pregnancy, yet there’s still always so much to read about. I’ll recommend “Breastfeeding Mums” Facebook group to all, it’s really informative and supportive! Thank you Irene Toh for inviting me to the group, and I would also specially like to thank my dear friend Tess Lee, who was super duper uber supportive to me during this period. I swear that I’ll be as supportive as I can to any friend facing breastfeeding woes!! Yea, feel free to come to Suki!!! Knowing how mother’s milk can do good to your baby makes it all worth it. This must be my biggest determination since I was born.
Suki 好介绍 time. Please download Wonder Weeks app, it’s amazing!! Babies go through growth spurts and leaps from time to time. Every leap, they develop and learn new skills.. and tend to be more cranky and needy. Little little things to us, can be a great skill they need to learn. This app preempts us and teaches us how to help our little one learn and develop. Damn zhun one! It’s a paid app btw. 😉
Oh ya.. this Monthly Vaccine jabs is a tough nut to deal with… because baby will be a bit feverish and cranky after jabs, so keep nursing! Doctor say one! Even if you are sick, just wear a mask and keep nursing! Here’s a smal piece of advice to all, just go to polyclinics! Infants get priority queues, and it’s FOC for most jabs.
And best to arrange your jabs early morning, on a Friday.. and you have whole weekend to be with your baby if she is unwell. Just don’t be too bothered about those stupid percentiles digits, as long as your baby is constantly growing and developing well, it’s ok!
By the way, who says baby skin is always smooth and nice.. why is my baby skin not the case?? 🙁 See, she’s still smiling just breaks my heart even more!
She has persisting cradle cap that attacks on the brows, scalp and ears! and now, furious eczema! sobsss… Self-reflecting moment, is she allergic to my milk? Re-looked at my diet and cutting out diary soy seafood spices and eggs… We brought her to the PD twice, doc says it isn’t my diet.. so.. what is it? Its just some babies take months to years to mature their skin in the world outside Mummy’s womb. Also.. try to stay in a cooling environment, its possibly the heat is making her rashes worse too..
And.. latest news, Teething!! V is teething at 5.5 months! Two at a time, and not sure if it’s the leap, or issit teething, she sleeps less, and sleeps worse!! As bad as waking up every hour and cryyyyy! I also want to cry! Hang on there!! 2 more sprouting teeth at 8.5 months!! 誰能讓她舒服一點，我日子也能好過一點….
I cccccseriously do not know how to write an end to this entry, I drafted this entry since she was four months old, and keep adding.. addig.. only managed to post this up when she is nine months old! No time because I rather spend time with her everyday! It’s magical that she makes me laugh at the end of every workday! No wonder people quit their jobs to be stay-home moms!
Parenthood is a lifetime!! Not just because I’m a new mom I get more paranoid, but it’s because A Mother Never Stops Worrying. And pls think twice before you call any Mom, especially working moms, a “Typical” mom, because that is such an understatement.
December 16, 2015
And so the EDD-day has arrived, which means the baby in my belly has grown gigantic and reached 40th week full term. How can we not take a selfie? ;p
Last picture the night before we head out for dinner with YishunKakis. Hee..
We have decided to take our gynae’s advice, to induce labor as baby’s getting heavy and big, labor may not be easy for me, better not end up in emergency caesarian.
Early in the morning ard 8am, we set off to our gynae’s clinic, feeling really nervous and excited! I don’t have to look out for contractions or worry about being messy if I burst the waterbag at home or in the car.. heh..
We were too early, the clinic was not open yet.. so, Go for breakfast!! Delifrance again.. seriously, TMC need more food options!!!
Around 10am, I was in the room all set up to monitor baby’s heartbeat, and my contractions.. seems like there are no signs of labor, so my gynae inserted the induction pill. Interesting rte.. a pill can do such wonders. That’s me lying there waiting for the pill to set in…
Once the pill has set in, we were told to go walk walk, as much as I can, so as to “activate” the pill. We went to Orchard, but shops were not open yet, I decided to have my final hairwash, a good one. Only Protrim at Takashimaya was available with not too extravagant charges, but result was worse than my own hairwash at home. =,= Ok nvm. Lets have a good lunch at Ding Tai Feng!!! Meanwhile, contractions began to get more regular and bad… I already lost most of my appetite. I used iPhone app Contractions to record the duration and intervals.
Around 12.30pm, we went back to the clinic, checked, diliation is only 1.5cm T_T
Waited till 2.30pm, gynae asked us to go do admission, I’m ready to be put on a drip to further induce my labor. Dear Little Sesame still don’t wanna come out ahh…
I was given medicine to clear my bowels. I immediately rushed to the toilet and let out everythinggggg.. I guess I lost 2kg instantly.. 😀 Gynae came by to check on me, and she promptly decided to break my waterbag with her magic finger.. a prick and GUSH!!! It’s like a warm gush of water rushing and flowing out… what a sensation lor!!! Bbbrrahhhh!!
With the pill in the morning, drip and breaking of waterbag.. it only meant PAIN, VERY PAIN contractions! The nurses prepared and taught me how to breathe in the laughing gas, it kinda eased a lil’ bit but not much help when contractions became so frequent and strong. I even had side effects from it and puked!! Arghh, decided to dump the whole laughing gas idea!
Epidural.. yes. Never did I expect my whole epidural experience to be so bad.. thanks to a bad anesthesia doctor and nurse! The contractions were almost unbearable, the pain was at my abs and front that I can’t even lie down properly. When the epidural injection needles were poked into my back, I jumped a bit with natural reflex, I was then told to curl up to let him do the procedure. The doctor said I shldn’t jump because he can’t guarantee if he found my spine or not, he’s just trying his luck, if he didn’t manage to find it, he will just have to redo and poke again. ARGH. Where’s his professionalism? Really. Meanwhile, he never stopped chatting with this pinoy nurse who’s assisting him, chatting bo liao stuffs like where to go and what to eat later.. Seriously?!! 老娘痛得要命，你們在話家常，真想大喊 “都給我閉嘴！” I CRIED feelin pissed and 委屈. I do not understand why Pail was not allowed to stay with me, he had to stand outside to wait.
Time passed and I do not know how long later.. I felt worse and worse with the soreness cramps even after the epidural procedure. I was told not to lie on my back, so I layed on one side, holding on to the bed rails, with one hand on drip unable to move, another hand with blood pressure monitored and had to stretch out straight. Oh man!
Contraction pain became cramps that were so sore I can’t take it.. 感覺好酸好酸～ Nurse Tin is a much nicer and more compassionate nurse who took over and gave me oxygen gas to breathe. She’s also a filipino, I do not know how to describe what is “酸” to her. Haha.. and I still have not feel numbness at my feet at all. =,= I wish my tolerance of pain is as high as my tolerance level towards medicine. This insensitive doctor’s attitude was really bad when Nurse Tin suggested if I can increase dosage of epidural. Instead of advising me what to do, he asked me “So how? U want to increase dosage ah? Up to u la.. so how? u want? u want?” ARGH!! I miss my Dr Wong… but I could only cry to Pail.
Around 5pm in the evening, Pail went to have his dinner. The nurses inserted urine tube for me so that I don’t have to get down the bed, well I couldn’t anyway. I felt like a 尿失禁 patient.. can’t even feel myself peeing, but I can see it happening! haha.. I asked Nurse Tin to check dilation for me, 3-4cm! (with ongoing soreness and oxygen intake) but gynae estimated it’s probably gonna happen at midnight.
Another 2 hrs passed, my dilation suddenly shot up to 8-9cm! That’s it, ready for the Toughest mission of all ever~~~ every time there’s a contraction coming, I need to raise my two legs up on the bed, signal Nurse Tin who was also my midwife, Pail will hold my hand and I’ve to curl my chin inwards touching my chest, HOLD MY BREATH to do THREE PUSHES. It’s like using abs muscle to poo during constipation but with 10x more energy and continuous three pushes.. PUSH, PUSHH.. PUSHHHHHHH with all my might yet I cannot make the “erghhhhh (gek sai)” sound, coz the nurses say I may hurt my throat, so what we see in movies are all fake!! I can’t scream at all?! I had to keep quiet and push?!?! The whole procedure is just too toughhh, I can only hold my breaths long enough to do 2 pushes, and around 8pm, gynae came back in her casual outfit, oooh so she has made a trip home to and fro as she didn’t expect my dilation to open so quickly. She had requested the nurses to prepare forceps earlier to assist my delivery, but, the inflexible paperwork system has delayed the delivery of forceps because they had to fill up some forms or duno what la.. anyways..
After an hour of PUSHHHHHing.. + the help of forceps and midwives pushing my belly, and most importantly Pail’s support by my side, our little sesame Baby Vera was born with weight of 3.5kg!!!
*Pail and I both in tears!*
First touch ❤️
Yes!!! WE DID IT!!!
Today I felt exceptionally emotional posting this entry, because Vera has reached the 3-months old milestone today!! Motherhood has been awesome. Darling Vera, Papa & Mama named you Vera because it means Faith. We hope you’ll always have faith in doing anything in your life. 🙂
December 15, 2015
This post is about the JOY of being pregnant with a baby. I shall not talk about the woes and shocks I’ve gone through yet.. maybe in a separate post. 🙂
During the second trimester.. despite the pregnancy symptoms like extreme soreness and numbness in my hand that I can’t even sleep at ease, and also still some nausea from the first trimester up till May.. we went to Bangkok for a BABYMOON!!! Hee.. as advised by my gynae, this is the best period to travel when the bump isn’t too big, and good appetite has returned to me too. Heh.. I love the resort stay at Hua Hin, and lotsa shopping for the little one in Bangkok!! And throughout the whole pregnancy, I was very well taken care of by Pail, he is the best hubby I could ask for lah.. he did all the housechores, and cooked meals and red bean soups for me.. he even learnt how to cook bird nest my Dad bought. He has such empathy for me that he has more pregnancy cravings than me, and his taste buds changed gradually because he started eating spicy food! Hahaa.. We also attended Mrs Wong Boh Boi ‘s prenatal classes, which was extremely fun and helpful. We learnt lots and by attending such classes together, I feel it pulls us closer even more, I love to see us working towards the same goal together, giving support to one another!
Moving into the Last trimester, it was fun and happy too, I quite enjoyed it because my bump is getting bigger.. and I know the little one is growing well. It’s very amazing when I can see so clearly that she is kicking me and especially when she has hiccups! Ha! My belly will move with rhythm! Oh ya, my train rides had been great too, because I met many kind souls giving up their seats for me. There are also priorities given to pregnant women whenever there are queues.. Dressing up the bump was fun because I don’t need to worry about being fat or not! Hehz..
Here are some significant Baby Bump shots! Love it when the bump is HUGE! Haha!
My water retention was pretty bad.. my shoes don’t fit anymore, even my wedding band doesn’t fit anymore! But I still wanna wear it so this was what I did.
This is what babies see when parents look at them in baby cots/baby strollers. 😀
I felt sooo hot everyday, temperature raised like duno what.. and I was so happy to hear drinking coconut water is good for last few weeks of pregnancy, whether or not the myth about clean babies is true, I don’t care because it’s so hydrating and cooling!!!
Meeting up with friends were super happy every weekend too, not forgetting, we celebrated our 6th Dating Anniversary at Salt and Grill. I treated every outing with friends as the last outing before I pop!! Coz we don’t know when it’s gonna be!! Hehehe… and all in all, it’s Eating and More Eating, Shopping and More Shopping, and
Sleeping.. hmm, nope, sleeping was not fun. I had to sleep sitting up.. and the frequent toilet visits.. Boohoo… I advise all Mommies to get enough pillows, it’s really important and useful!!!
Thankfully, my company allows me to work from home very often as and when required. Being super appreciative of that, I made sure I did not take any advantage of this benefit and I really worked hard in this little corner of the house. By now, I could no longer sit on the floor using the coffeetable, I needed to sit on a proper chair and work on the table. 🙂
Oh! Setting up the nursery was pretty fun. I decided I want a WHITE nursery room that signify PURE for our little one. We wouldn’t want the room to be too over girly, always bearing in mind, 我們要走氣質路線！Haha! Oh, and that’s the gigantic bloated me in pyjamas sitting in the nursery… :p
My gynae has instructed me to do at least 20 squats daily, and do lotsa walking! So that the little one will come out one week earlier, and labor could have been easier. My darling little one seems to have inherited Mommy’s genes; on the plump side! 2.7kg at 37 weeks! Haha! Although shopping is considered walking, but since we have a treadmill at home, I made it a point to walk everyday while watching TV after work (tat’s why makeup is still on!). Heh.. Pail held my hand and did squats with me too, because by now, I feel pain squatting and can’t do it without holding on to something/someone.
I’ve been experiencing the tightening of my belly as hard as rock.. and whenever I lie down, it comes and go more often, which I will have difficulty catching my breath, so breathless that I had to wake Pail up to help me sit up to catch my breath!! These are called Braxton Hicks, which are very common throughout pregnancy. They are very similar to contractions, but not feeling any pain.. as they became more frequent, we were thinking could labor be near? So.. the very last few days before I pop, I suggested to Pail to take half day off let’s go dating… celebrating his birthday in advance. 😉
Lastly… Heh… the anticipating when the little one is going to pop was exciting!! Could it be 1st Sept? 9th Sept? 11th Sept? Hohoho…this is all we want to say.